When I first decided to start my little blog, I knew without hesitation that Faith would be the first word in the title. I wanted it to center around the most important part of my life. Yet, when it came to writing about my faith, something was stopping me.
At first, it was easy to avoid. An idea would pop into my head, and I wouldn’t even let my mind dwell on it. “Later”, I would tell myself, and on to something else. Then it started getting harder and harder and harder to avoid! It was there in the back of my mind all the time. I had to address it head on and ask myself what was stopping me. I wasn’t ashamed of my faith. I would share with anyone without hesitation that I was a Christian. I’ve always had the gift of being able to speak my mind, sometimes an overabundance of that gift, LOL!
I finally had to admit to myself that it was fear. Not fear of what people would think, but fear that I would let Him down. Fear that I wouldn’t do a good enough job, fear that I wasn’t the right person, fear I wasn’t good enough. At first I couldn’t even bring myself to pray about it, but eventually I surrendered and prayed that God would use me how He saw fit, and give me the courage to do what that was. I knew the truth was I wasn’t good enough, but then I realized that’s ok! God uses imperfect people, because none of us are good enough on our own. That’s why we needed a Savior!
I also needed to realize where those negative thoughts come from, Satan! He wants us to feel inadequate, ill-equipped to spread the word of God. On my own, I absolutely am inadequate. But I think when we surrender to what God is calling us to do He will patch our holes so that we become an adequate vessel to do his will.
I still feel like I know so many people that are such better Christians than me, that would be so much better at writing about their Faith. I’ve made so many mistakes throughout my life, and continue to do so! Thankfully His mercies are new every morning! So if you’re reading this and will be following along, please know I’m not trying to set myself up as an expert on being on a perfect Christian. Far from it, more accurately, I’m a work in progress, someone who loves Jesus, someone who constantly falls short, and someone who has a sincere desire to strengthen my relationship with Christ.
Starting today, I’m putting those fears of inadequacies behind me and stepping out on faith. I plan on sharing much more of my faith and my Christian walk, and I sincerely pray that God uses it how he sees fit.